31 December, 2009

you are lady gaga...

Ok ok ok ok, I am the worst blogger ever…it has been since May that I have come here to enthrall you all with my wisdom…and even that last blog in May was to say that I haven’t blogged in a while…(like me I guess this blog is a work in progress, puke)

…see the funny thing is I think about stuff I want to write about all the time, but getting it from head to web, just, well…I even take notes in Mr. blackberry of things to write about but then when I look back I can’t always remember what the note was about or why (i.e. current note example says “monkey butts”; what did that mean and does anyone want to read a blog about monkey butts, [p.s. I kinda do])…

So anyway since May a good bit has happened and most of it was probably funny at the time…but that is the past, and this decade (2010) I am leaving my past behind and focusing on the future…which is my yogi sounding way of saying “I am in no way going to deal with, answer for, or pay up for any of my past mistakes and I am most likely dammed to commit them all over again!!! AND I am ok with that!!

Before 2010 here are some photos from the past year…

and now on to 2010...

06 May, 2009

the bad blogger

hey yall...
i want to do something new to keep this blog interesting and interesting to me,
but not to clear yet on what that means...i am thinking twittering it for awhile...i have a new phone and will be getting a new number soonish once that happens i will start twitter fest 2009...i'll let you know!!!

other than that...

17 April, 2009

Chicken Tetrazzini

so this is rocking my world this minute...i played the clip for my office mates and they didn't believe when i said the people were speaking English...

12 March, 2009

Bye Pauline!

many of you may know one of my favorite things in the world is a little British show called Eastenders! It began in 1985 and in the states runs on PBS and is exactly five years behind the British show its great!! One of the original cast members just died and i am sad. Her name was Wendy Richard she was 65.
On Eastenders she played Pauline Fowler, tough talking wise-cracking launderette worker...she ran a tight ship. She is missed around Albert Square.

She was also famous for another role very close to my heart, that of Miss Brahms in the series Are You Being Served?

She had many other roles and was a staple of British TV...

My thoughts also go out this week to Zimbabwe's Prime Minister Morgan Tsvangirai over the loss of his wife Susan...They are fighting for the countries freedom and it is very sad loss for him as well as Zimbabwe.

10 March, 2009

Happy Holi

Tomorrow is Holi so i have the day off! Wel-come spring!!


As you may remember I had a Goa attitude, a’ Goatude’ if you will, I am here to say…I mean I am man enough to admit that well…I was right! Ha!!

So Goa was actually amazing, I had a really great time. The wedding was amazing. The beach was beautiful. I gots my sunburn on…so I was happy!!

I took a train down on Friday night after work. I met up with two girl students and one Indian teacher to take the train.

Girl 1-Alexis from California America is nice but also very distant…Girl 2-Sarah from Australia was funny…the Indian is totally annoying, he was trying really hard to impress the girls, they totally didn’t care, he told these story’s about his life that I am sure where out and out lies.

The train left at 10: pm and would arrive in Goa around 7am. The others were in a different part of the train, which I liked. There was a nice man in my birth, we spoke for awhile, the whole time his wife was doing ‘the head-bob’ when she would ‘bob up’, I got a glare like I was keeping her awake. Anyway the guy works across from my flat so we are supposed to go for dinner one day…I don’t know how I get myself into these messes. So I went to bed round 11 and woke up in Goa, easy peasy!!

From the station we took a private car to the beach where the wedding party was staying…about an hour. It was nice to see Goa waking up and to see so many catholic churches. Goa is a Catholic state and there are crosses and Jesus’ everywhere. I had always thought of Goa as a place instead of a state, but there are many beaches some really touristy and others not so much. We stayed in Arambol which some would say was touristy, others would say it wasn’t as touristy. I say it was way touristy…so many white hippies, yuck. I just never understand when white people come to India why they think they can stop showering, wear these ridiculous baggie pants, and take drugs. It makes the Indians think we are all freaks.

Once there we kinda had to walk far to the hotel area, but it was nice to be able to check out the beach. I got a room, very simple (I would only be there one night), and had a shower, ate breakfast then I went to have a swim. The water was great, most water in India is untouchable but this was terrific. I was out for half an hour and got totally burnt it was awesome.

Then shower lunch, nap, wedding! The wedding was at five under a paniquin on the beach. It was loverly. Aili, the bride, my co-worker, is from Italy and Anirudh, the groom, is from Punjab. The wedding was small maybe 50 people of all different Nationalities…Citizens of the World!!!

The wedding was probably two hours but you could walk away, chat, have a drink then come back. The ‘service’ is in ‘old Hindi’ which no-one understand so it was casual. Aili looked stunning, she wore a sari, which I normally don’t like on western people but after living here 8 years I guess she has switched nationalities and pulled it off beautifully. I looked really nice, I had on a summer blazer I got at Target for 10 bucks.

Afterward there was a reception…it was fun, great great food, I danced. We then all went to a bar on the beach, then this strange guy Jeet and I went swimming at 4am.

The next morning I got up early, round 9am, and went for a swim. I ran into Ritesh, a guy I work with, he said that where he stayed he could hear the ocean and it kept him awake cause he was afraid a Tsunami would come, he had never been to the beach before…it was kind of cute……

Then breakfast, bath, another swim. This time I took Ritesh and he was really afraid but didn’t want me to see that so he just sucked it up and had a blast!!! I was worried just going for such a short time I would be rushed but as you can see I had plenty of time to swim swim swim!

Then I met everyone for a late lunch, the food tasted nasty. Then we had to leave. I went back to my hotel got my bag. Walking with the gang to met our car I thought I better get my passport out cause that’s where my train ticket was…I couldn’t find my passport so I had to run back to my hotel and it was hot and I had just eaten…anyway laying right on my bed was my passport and camera…can you believe it…I am so not that person that forgets that kind of stuff…anyway in the car, I felt sick but I figured it was from running in the heat. On the train my stomach started to hurt. I got up around midnight to stretch my legs and ended up barfing!!

So the rest of the trip home was yucky and then the rest of the week was weird…but it hasn’t tarnished my Goan vaca. I can see why people go there (although I have to say when I went down south to Kerela the beaches were prettier and less populated) and I am sure I will someday return to Goa…it seems to be one of those places that are fun because you are with fun people.

this is Goa

from left to right Malcolm (ex-coworker), Alexis the American, Aili, Husband, Sarah the Australian, Ritesh co-worker, me!

Aili and the husband


04 March, 2009

dear readers

OK i know you all are on 'pins and needles' waiting for the Goa blog....but...you will have to wait!!

Unfortunately the very last meal i ate in Goa poisoned me and i am still very very sick...trust me, being sick on a 10 hour train from Goa puts one in mood not quickly shaken off...so i am not in a very happy/positive mood to write and Goa was amazing so i want to feel better to express it...so you will have to sit tight!!
(sorry i am still sick mom! jeez!! haha)

one funny story, not related to my tummy or Goa...a women in Florida was arrested for calling 911 to complain that her local McDonald's was out of Chicken McNuggets!

Here's the transcript of one of her calls:

"This is an emergency, if I would have known they didn't have McNuggets, I wouldn't have given my money, and now she wants to give me a McDouble, but I don't want one, this is an emergency!"

Oh black people, I miss you!!

03 March, 2009

goodbye winter

winter was over last wednesday...to all of ya'll buried under snow in my northern states...yesterday it was 100 in Mumbai and today it is 101!!

tomorrow goa blog!!

24 February, 2009

Your Fat, Go-Go to Goa!!

So my friend w!l will be thrilled to know….I am going to Goa!

My co-worker Aili, from Italy, is getting married to an Indian guy and their wedding is 28th Feb in Goa. I have tried to avoid Goa because everybody loves it. Every retarded tourist just goes on and on about how great it is…it makes you sick. It is very popular to do drugs in Goa. So many young British/American people go there, get really messed up on drugs, get raped or robbed and then try to complain that the Indian people are evil. But that’s where she’s getting married so that’s where I am going.

I leave on 27th Friday and come back 29th Sunday, even if I hate it it’s just a day. I am taking the train down at night, it’s a sleeper car and I’ll get there Saturday morning round 7 am and hopefully napping on the beach by 8. This is actually my first vacation since I came to India. Both times I have been home to US the trip has been filled with Visa stress. My trip to Nepal was Visa stress and the two times I have gone out of Mumbai was for shoots, which turn out to be stressful so I am looking forward to de-stressing!!

American idol…so this season is playing here…and I hate that all the men are fat! In times of economic trouble it seems gross to be eating in excess when some families can’t. If we are a country ‘dedicated to fighting terrorist’ isn’t important to be physically fit for same…how you are going to flee a burning building or fight the Taliban as a big fat porker!

Back to AI, I don’t care about the contestants children, nobody told you to have them instead of following your dreams, don’t use them for votes now…that goes double for dead wives…do you really expect us to like your music more cause you have children and dead wife’s…puke!!!

So yeah I guess I do need a stress break…ha-ha

here’s something funny…so eating lunch is a big deal here…many don’t have breakfast so everybody goes for lunch…you don’t skip it…lunch time is around 2pm and for the hour before and after anytime you run into anyone they say “have you taken lunch?” or “have lunch?” or they will put there fingers to their mouths motioning eating (cause you eat with your hands) and shake their head which means did you eat. Sometimes it feels funny that everyone is so concerned about if I am eating…of course I lie all the time and say “in my country we don’t eat lunch!”

oh and yeah big props to Slumdog for giving Indians their first Oscars…people here are freaking out, you’d think some fat ass just won American Idol!

Oh this too…there is a great language website called livemocha it’s an EASY way to learn a foreign language. I’ve been on it for a week and learned sooo much Hindi... they have many languages and it’s cool!!!

this is goa...

17 February, 2009

Sleeping Single in a Dabule Bed

So after much talk about and not much doin about…I have finally bought a bed.
It is popular or acceptable here to sleep on just a futon type of mattress. This is what I have been using but now that I am getting paid I opted for a proper bed…I went to Hypercity, Mumbai’s Target, and they were having a half price sale so I laid down my rs. 5000 (US 100) and got a bed.

It was to be delivered on Saturday, then a ‘guy’ would come Sunday to put it together. I got the mattress from a different shop. It was also to be delivered on Saturday. So on Saturday the mattress arrived and it was huge, like really huge. I was kinda freaking out thinking they sent the wrong size and things like returns are just not done in India. I began trying to come up with ways I could cut the mattress down to size…which seemed like it was gonna be messy. The man shows up on Sunday to build my bed and he said ‘sir, place is not big’ which in English meant I might be in trouble…he toiled away while I came to terms with the idea that I wouldn’t be able to return either and may screwed out of a poop load of rupees. The bed was finished and my apartment shrank and then shank some more…basically now my apartment is nothing but a bed…so I have decided there is nothing to do but become a prostitute…turn lemons into lemon-aid I say!

The same day, Saturday, I also got delivered a refrigerator. Apartments don’t come with them (or stoves), you buy them separately. There are several different sizes of fridges available in India, depending on your budget. The one I got is 180 liters, I have no idea what that means except that it is between collage size and household size, it’s cute, but adds terrible to my shrinking apartment size.
Now a week later I have come to terms with my apartment and my big bed…I love it!!
Suddenly I have this whole new apartment…it fun and the best part is I don’t need anything else…except a wok and dishes and a extension cord and socks and brown shoes and…

Update: got a wok, I went and got some pans and tons of food to fill up my fridge…and then I ran out of gas…like my gas cylinder that has lasted me one year finally ran out, the very day I buy cookware and food…Murphy’s Law India style!!

05 February, 2009

Music and Fried Chicken are my Boyfriends

Tuesday night found me having dinner at Kentucky Fried Chicken with Kerala’s most eligible bachelor, a Doctor to boot, he of course is smitten with me, as they all are, that is all Indians, not just Kerelan doctors….but I digress…so this Doctor tells me he likes ‘grunge’ music… notice I said “likes” and not “liked”…personally I didn’t think grunge existed anymore…I told I used like grunge in the 90’s but now I wasn’t so sure…he asked what happen…I said I moved on…it got me to thinking…about musical progression, my musical progression. I have always wanted to be in a musical…so here it is my musical…”the progression”.

I was round 6 years old in 1976, I don’t remember having a musical past before that, really just whatever was on the radio…although I do remember a 45 record I had about Hiawatha and Running Bear that I wore out as a child…and my Mom loves to tell a story of how I wanted some neighborhood kid to hear one of my records so I put it on the turntable and locked him in my room…I wish I knew which song I thought was important enough to cause me to commit kidnapping…my mom is/was/always will be a Kris Kristofferson fan so I heard him in the house a lot…no, I mean A LOT!!!…
Popular in America around this time was Barry Manilow, John Denver, my dog Pasta’s favorite band The Carpenters, The Captain and Tennille.

1976-1982 – even as an eight year the disco beat had me…red flag?...big for me was the Grease soundtrack, The Bee Gee’s, Donna Summer, Oliva Newton John…her album ‘Totally Hot’ from 1978 was just that…Totally Hot!!! 1979 for me was all about ‘Le Freak’, ‘YMCA’, and ‘I will Survive’.

1981-1987 – from Disco I transitioned into New Wave. I lived on a farm and didn’t get the latest music when the city folk did, so I was a few years behind… I was 13 (1982) and this was my self identifying music. It didn’t belong to my mom…my brother liked Heavy Metal and Rush (which I had to hate cause he liked it). This was mine, topping the list were The Thompson twins (my first favorite band, have you seen my Thompson twin tattoo?), Culture Club, Dépêche Mode, and Pet Shop Boys (1986). Erasure hit in 1985 and became my new favorite replacing the now fading Twins (tear). I was also listening to harder punk bands like Dead Kennedys and Crass as well but New Wave was where my heart was.

In 1987 I left high school and the farm, my family shifted to South Carolina. There wasn’t much of a scene there and this was pre-internet so my taste became a bit more radio friendly and ‘clubby’. Around this time I started working in Record stores and my exposure to different kinds of music really opened up. During this time I was listening to REM, I warmed up to Madonna (when she first came out I was still ‘punk’ and liking her was not cool), I was totally into Erasure by then, I discovered the musical ‘Into the Woods’, Morrissey was solo now and I loved him, The Communards was my first CD, The sugarcubes entered the world and brought us Bjork. The times and I were a changin’…

1991 1994-I began living in Atlanta, which was all about and Hip Hop/Rap music, also Tori Amos’ first record came out I became a HUGE fan. I was, for the first time, going to discotheques so I heard and loved a lot of really cheesy gay dance crap which I now regret…did I really like CeCe Peniston’s ‘Finally’... During this time was when grunge was around, Nirvana hit in 1991 with ‘…Teen Spirit’ and I was not immune to their charms…although Pearl Jam was my grunge band…’Elderly Woman Behind The Counter In A Small Town’ has had an impact on me and my ‘being’ that has been immeasurable…and one I am not fully comfortable with talking about here…

1994-1995 I went traveling round the world…so I missed out on a bit but during that time. While in Egypt I found in my hotel room a discarded copy of a British magazine ‘the face’ and read about Brit pop! I loved it without hearing it, I liked the way it looked, I liked what the best said/stood for. All the brits I met during this time were ‘mad’ about brit-pop and a band I would later love called Blur.
1995 I got a job at Hard Rock Café and my taste leaned a bit harder as rock music was being hammer into my head everyday at work, at the same time I was diving in to Britpop with gusto.

1997 I moved to Philadelphia, by this time my musical tastes were all over the place and I was at a point in my life, I was 27(?) where I listened to what I wanted to, not cause it was cool or popular, but because I liked it…as long as it was alive and fun and interesting!!

That theme…interesting, fun, alive is still where I am today…currently I can love the new Beyonce, TV on the Radio, Antony and the Johnson, Bjork, Santo Gold, Britney Spears and Bollywood all at the same time and feel by each….I am happy with in my musical world…I love the rush I get from getting the latest CD from some band I love…simply, in 2009, I can say I love music…Music is my Boyfriend!

Side note---The next night I went back to the same KFC restaurant with some co-workers and the guy at the counter said “you here again, where is your partner?” and it made me think…you know how on LOST Hurley has some sort of ‘magic ability’...like he sees ‘things’…well Hurley used to work at this fast food chicken restaurant Mr. Clucks… what if this guy is the Indian Hurley, what if he can/is seeing something…what if this Kerelan doctor SHOLUD be my partner…and then I came to my senses…and realized that I should get out more…end scene!

And now for those who don’t know and for my mom…here’s some vintage Kris!!

Peace out and Rock on!!

03 February, 2009

photo funda part 2

these next pics are of my awesome Christmas decorations and from a Christmas party i went to...I found this shop near me that sold decorations but not a wide selection. On Christmas eve i went to midnight mass (which was from 8:30 to 10:45? when i asked why it wasn't at midnight they said "because of terrorist". I went with a co-worker and his friends it was nice. Mass was in four different languages (Hindi, English Marathi, and some south Indian language) but they didn't repeat each part they just did each section in a different tongue. The church was in the Christan part of town and there were tons of shop selling Christmas junk so next year I'm a gonna go

the next pics are from the after-mass party...there is no explanation possible...The guy in the white button down is my co-worker Harvey...he got fired two weeks ago and it sucked he was my best work friend!

and lastly from New Years...my co-worker Aili had a party...and here is some of the madness

so there you have it...Mumbai...i know it looks like all i do is go to parties but it was the holidays...since then i only watch TV...ok so thats a lie...anyway...rock on!!

02 February, 2009

photo funda part 1

so friday my office banned Facebook, myspace, and all types of chat services...so today i have nothing to do...haha...

so i'll update...themaid search is sort of dead in the water...my friend had one and said she could come to my place as well but she wanted to be there all the time and i have a tiny tiny place. her being there too much felt like too much, ya know. anyway when we were talking about the maid my indian said youre a gora (white) why should you be washing clothes...ouch!!

i bought a bed...which shouldnt be big news but i have just been putting it off for the past year...and anyway the deliver on the 7th then the next day a guy will come to put it together...

so work is kinda stinky right now...like for the past 4 months...taking this job may have been a mistake...but if there is one thing India has taught me, time and time again...India gives you just what you need...you may not know you need it, or what to do with it, but you'll figure it out, then it will be awesome! so i am just going to sit back and let India work her magic!!

below are some pics...first are my co-workers

these are mango's...i've eaten mango's before, but here in India they grow magic into them, they are a-ma-zing!! there are like 20 different kinds...these are the ones i like...i don't know their name it begins with a "T"

For some reason i wake up early in India...maybe it's my age..anyway this is the morning view from my balcony...they are not good quality...i live next to a mountain, between me and the mountain is a milk colony (dairy) you can sort make it out at the bottom...i love it there!!!

i have more but so this may be a two parter...

22 January, 2009

blackberry obama lost

i am think about getting the new blackberry storm and becoming one of those people. i keep thinking i need to buy a bed, but i would rather have a cool phone...maybe i already am one of those people.

next week i am interviewing maids...i am totally one of those people!!!

p.s.this week i was happy, go obama...and sad "lost" isn't shown in india!!