29 May, 2008

mein tere khoon pee jaahoonga

last Friday i did a shoot for a film called "fashion". i had done crowd scene for before...it was boring but finished early and one of my favorite people Shafiq was there. he's an awesome Afghan guy, really smart and funny. he's 24(?) and has lived more lives than all of us put together. it's crazy how people live in these "war torn" countries and instead of giving up on life they find a way to push forward and end up being stronger than you could ever imagine...talking to him is always fun and enlightening!

that night, my trainer...so yeah i have this trainer, strange part is, i don't belong to his gym and he does not actually train me but he always introduces me as someone he trains, which given my body shape and low muscle mass does not make him look very skilled at training...so anyway he called and said he wanted to come over...which is odd cause we sort of don't have that "come over" kind of relationship...i guess i have a stupid crush on him, he use to be Mr.India so he's a muscle giant, blah blah blah. he came over and we watched cricket...i know right...anyway i have sort of gotten into cricket...there is this cricket series called the IPL and it's fun...all the bollywood stars own a team and it's filled with controversy...anyway...the trainer (Rana) comes over we drink whiskey, watch cricket and then he jumps up and says he has to go...end scene...it was too weird...twenty minutes later he calls and says he's at a party and i should come, he'll text me the address...an hour later he calls to say the party isn't safe for me to be at...i don't know. i go to bed.

Saturday night...trainer calls and we meet at this intersection of a major highway where we have to meet some friends. while waiting for the friends he drags me around showing people that he in fact hangs out with white people...we then get on his motorcycle and go riding around. it was one of those moments in life where you just have to stop and think...life is great and funny...here i am in India riding around on the back of a bike with mr.india...and despite the intense weirdness of our friendship, this moments is fun!! we met his friends. trainer presses his finger against his nose and says "do you want"...i said 'you do drugs' he looked horrified and so "no...prostitutes"...so what we think of as the "do a bump" symbol here means "do you want whore sex"....i said "i am a Christan i can't" and thus Jesus saved me from sleeping with a prostitute. we went to a bar and drank then he dropped me of at home. he told me that if anyone ever was mean to me he would "crush" them...how can you not love that...

Sunday i had an audition for an ad-film, which i thought went well, but i didn't get it. for the audition, i had to say famous lines from Hindi films past...the ads a spoof on people learning Hindi by watching bollywood films...i learned how to say "mein tere khoon pee jaahoonga"..."i will drink your blood". it's the Indian equivalent of "I'll be back". i say it all the time now!!

Monday i went to an audition for a TV serial. they handed me the script and it was all in Hindi. "oh, i don't speak Hindi". "that's OK" an hour later i am sent in for audition and they are shocked that in the hour i waited i didn't learn Hindi. so i didn't do the audition...two days later i got a call that they were giving me a part...this city, ya gotta love it...i haven't heard anything since so i think they may have changed their minds, they were so disorganized that i don't really mind...and TV pay is low so...

i was called to do another day on the fashion shoot. it was an awards banquet scene and i got to sit on stage as a "presenter or judge"...then they filmed and "after party' scene in which i was grouped with the main actors and that was really really cool...star fucker!

yesterday i went for an audition for a film and got the part. i shooting my scene today in a few hours...i have lines!! the film is called "straight" and is about a guy trying to figure out if he is a "homo gay"...very shocking for bollywood...it seems like right now gay is the new black in bollywood....so bring it on...I'll tell you about the shoot tomorrow...

i just got back from a fitting for the TV serial i am going to do...i got all my questions answered and feel really good about it...it's set in 1750, i will play a banker not a doctor i will shot between 5-8 days per month for the next 3 months, which is a good job...so this has been a good week...it's felt great to be working again...OK i gotta wrap this up...take care

27 May, 2008

hey ya'll

OK i am a bad blogger...sorry...i have been working a bit...I've done some auditions...and i kinda of need to run now but will try to update you later...i have a pretend new boyfriend, Jesus saved me from sleeping with a prostitute, i think i have been cast in yet another long term serial and at 1:24 i can be seen in this video....

20 May, 2008

get random

1. gym: gyms here are expensive, more expensive than in the west. they are seen as such a luxury item that they can be given a high price tag. there are "cheap" gyms but India is proof absolute of the old saying "you get what you pay for". most gyms here have "ladies only" hours that run from 11-4. wearing street shoes is not allowed in the gyms, you must have a special pair of "dedicated" shoes and they are not to ever touch the street outside. i think i have narrowed my search but...every time i think I've picked one i find a new one and one of my big issues with being here in India is...

2. sounding board: i have to make every decision completely alone. while all my life i have applauded my freedom, sometimes i just want a second opinion. "which is better, the green umbrella or the red?"

3. rain: the monsoons are just a few weeks away and the city is sort of gearing up. you know how around Christmas you could run into an old friend and say "let's get together soon for coffee" and they say "oh it will have to be after the holidays"...well, that's sort of how the rains are seen. people apparently hibernate, yet it also seems like people don't even think about them, they are just a fact. i am really excited to see what it's like.

4. deodorant: c'mon India...learn the joys of real deodorant...and by real i mean...not AXE. people here just use these "axe" type of body sprays. most times this means spraying it in the pit area but OVER your shirt. they even do it that in the commercials. umm, i ride the public crowded trains, take it from me ,that does not work.

5.Gas: one of the most popular jeans brands here is called gas, people who wear them think they are hot shit...i think having fart written on your ass would at least be funny.

6. love story 2050 is a film about to be released. it is India's first ever sci-fi film...it looks really gooodish, i am in the background in one scene, the shoot was boring but the whole film is shot on green screen so it was interesting to see that process.

7. SITC will be released here on 6th June....i am thrilled!!!! unfortunately it will be edited for India sensibilities. yuck!

8. there is an Indian in WWF, who knew right...well India did and he is a superstar here...his name is Khaili, i think, and he is the most physically unattractive person in the world. he has just come back to India and you would think he fucking Jesus Christ reborn. on the news they do story's like khaili goes to the supermarket, khaili parks his car,,,he is sooo ugly but the best part is he's retarded, yes that's right retarded. now i don't think he was born retarded i think it's that weird retardation that come from steroid use...where is makes your vocal cords all drag queen sounding. mix that with type retardation that comes from getting bet up all the time...and you have retardation...now you have Khaili...but don't EVER EVER question he's retardation in India "is he retarded?" is met with fury and scorn...i say it all the time...hehe. here is a picture that actually makes him look somewhat decent...it's all about lighting...

alright i have to go watch D.A. win american idol...talk o you later!!!

13 May, 2008

today was a good day

considering the tragedy in china i guess it's not proper to title a blog as such but...it was a good day (for me).

i have had a really really bad head cold the past TWO WEEKS and i didn't realize the effect it was having on my general well being until yesterday when it decided to move on finding someone else's ass to kick. i thought i was just being lazy and didn't want to leave this house...but now the clouds have parted and i am back. it feels good!!!

about getting well: in India there are no prescription drugs. everything is OTC, yes everything; Valium, ketamine (this isn't in spell check but i guess you know what i mean, special K), Oxycontin...everything. when you need something you just go to the "pharmacy" and they give it to you. i told the clerk i had congestion and for 20 rupees he gave me these pills that made me loopy loopy loopy then i would sleep for 3 hours. but they worked so now i am better. ya me!!

i also worked today. i did a voice over. it was kinda fun. the strange part was...the guy i was dubbing: an American, is yelling at some Indian kids for being mean to his children...there was an empty space between 2 lines, so to fill it they had me say "you Indians are bad people, why don't you all just go back to India". i felt really uncomfortable in a room full of indians saying that...i know it's just a charcter in a film and fictional at that but...the director, somebody who's name i forgot, is actually somebody important here, so i said to him. "I really don't like saying that, it perpetuates a racist stereotype of Americans and takes the films story to a different place"...crickets chirp...he says "it's just Bollywood". end scene.

seems like the soap opera isn't dead yet but i really don't know anything else. the agent said (via SMS) that he had heard back and would call later, that was 2 days ago.

i am still gym hunting...i know i know...i am not working maybe joining a gym isn't the best thing...

anyway...love yourself..oh and i love the new madonna!

06 May, 2008


remember when i used to blog...well that was when i stuff to say but as of late...I've been spending way too much time doing a whole lot of nothing...i am not really working so much...in the past 3 weeks I've worked three days...so not too much is going on...but sadly i can tell you everything under the sun about Indian TV...speaking of Indian TV...i auditioned for a TV show which is a "historical soap opera" about the whole British VS. Indians thing. they called today to say i got a part (a doctor). that is sort of all i know, i think it's a six month commitment (awesome!) and i know that it shoots outside of Mumbai so when i am required i would have to stay the night out of Mumbai. we are going through the process now of figuring out payment...which is the icky part...they call and say "you have a part, how much do we have to pay you"...thing is they don't tell you any details of what i would actually be doing...so it's a weird process and even though they want me the whole thing could die in negations...but anyway...it will be as god wills it!!!

other than that i have just been cocooning...which has been nice but i know i need to start getting out...so i will...just as soon as American Idol, Amazing Race and Survivor are over...

oh and because i know you were all loosing sleep over it...I got the Madonna!!!